Show #132 April 4, 2015

Hey Joanne... LET'S DANCE!!


Joanne- Times Square Joanne 7" 
Let's Dance- The Ramones Ramones 
*Do The Boob- Real Kids Real Kids
*Do The Twisteroo- The Twisteroos Twisted! 
*Do The Robot- The Saints (I'm) Stranded 
Toys In The Attic- The CRY! Dangerous Game 
#37 [Feels So Strange]- Greenberry Woods Rapple Dapple 
Born In Toulouse- Chixdiggit! Double Diggits! 
^Do The Bartman- Bart Simpson Do The Bartman 
*Do The Standing Still- The Table Do The Standing Still 
*Do The Push- The Starjets God Bless The Starjets
Dancehall Domine- The New Pornographers Brill Bruisers 
Time Will Tell On You- The Rock Club Yellow Pills Vol 3 More Great Pop 
Sucking Out My Faith- Happiness Factor Self Improvement? 
*Do The Gal-I-Gator- Travoltas Teenbeat 
*Do The Pop- Radio Birdman Radios Appear 
*Do the Vampire- Superdrag Head Trip In Every Key
You Are Here- The Rubinoos 45 
Gonna Grab It- Rosetta Stone Retrospective Roller 1977-1979 
Topshop Bands- The Greatest Liar The Girl With The Chesnut Eyes 
*(Do The) Instant Mash- Joe Jackson Look Sharp! 
*Do the Chisel- The Soft Boys 1976-1981
*Do The Mutilation- The Revillos Attack of the Giant Revillos 
Perfect Girl- Spinning Jennies Starstruck 
The Other Side of You- Lime Spiders Nine Miles High 1983-1990 
Dreamcrusher Machine- The Shazam Meteor 
>Do The Strand- Roxy Music Do The Strand 
*Do The Panic- Phantom Planet Raise The Dead 
*Do The Dog- The Specials The Specials
The British Are Coming- Weezer Everything Will Be Alright In The End 
Feel The Noise- Paul Collins Feel The Noise 
Don't Wanna Lose- Ex Hex Rips 
Let's Dance- Pezband Pezband 

Power Pop Peak:  #11 Billboard Hot 100 Airplay 11/20/90

*SacroSet[s]:  "Do The" Dance Songs

>Power Pop Prototype:  1973 


Like a lot of white guys I was deeply ambivalent about
dancing when I was growing up.  Out on the dance floor I'd seen countless variations of what Billy Crystal would later call "the white man's overbite" in When Harry Met Sally and it wasn't pretty. 

The W.M.O.

That said, I have always loved music and it has always made me want to move.  I've never understood those people who can sit through a rock concert and complain bitterly if anyone in front of them stands up.  

I'm a lifelong spastic bedroom dancer- when the door is closed and the music is loud.  My first experience dancing in public was in Jr. High, a dance at Duxbury Intermediate School to be exact.  It's funny but guys in my school would rag on each other about anything- shoes, pants, shirt, legs, arms, torso, face, hair, etc.- but I don't recall hearing anyone razzed for their dancing.  I think this is because we ALL looked ridiculous out there- every single one of us.  If it

I could Gopher some Barbi Benton!

weren't for the chance to touch girls I bet we'd all rather have been home watching that legendary Saturday night double header Love Boat/Fantasy Island.  We might have been missing Barbi Benton!

 
For most white guys it seems like dancing, or even the possibility of dancing, is inextricably linked with alcohol- lots and lots of alcohol. I don't drink though so I had to come up with another plan.  Back in high school I decided that, along with the unpleasant facial expressions, another area where guys go wrong dancing is with the use of their arms.  Even James Freakin' Brown couldn't make the "butter churn" look good; this move is to be avoided at all costs, especially when danced "ironically."  (I hate ironic behavior so much- for God's sake people, COMMIT!)  

Friends Don't Let Friends Churn Butter

Anyway, to this day my "dance" calls for the arms to flop around limply at my sides.  The flopping part is very important because with rigid arms in a lowered position you risk looking like this:

Lord of The Douche

Another key to my "dance" is to keep the knees bent while leaning forward slightly at the waist.  This keeps you loose and helps avert a huge dancing buzzkill- making eye contact with another helpless dude on the dance floor.  Plus it makes you look like you are listening intently to the music and concentrating on your feet.  One more thing- in my "dance" you MUST move your feet laterally.  Moving up and down with your feet planted is to be avoided at all costs and in the name of all that is holy DO NOT jut out your chin.  Of course, more important than any of my patented "dance moves" is feeling the music and not giving a crap what anyone else thinks.  It's funny but this is exactly how I feel when I'm dancing at a rock show watching a band blow the doors off the place- the thought of how I look never even crosses my mind.  That's the thing I've always

Hey! Ho!  Let's Go!

loved about Sid Vicious' lone positive contribution to our world a dance called The Pogo.  The Pogo is a reflexive jump for joy, the rock and roll equivalent of a whale breaching.  When the jocks discovered that punk was an ideal outlet to channel their 'roid rage and/or latent homosexuality, my beloved Pogo devolved into slam dancing and moshing. 

I never liked the "Pit"

No doubt "Dance Like Nobody's Watching" is a hackneyed expression but that doesn't make it any less true- especially for white guys like me.  So it really doesn't matter if this is what we LOOK like dancing:

When this is what we FEEL like dancing.

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ALL KINDSA GIRLS #132